Expectations

Me on top of Lingira "mountain" - the hill that runs along the middle of my home island.

(Please note: The following contains raw honesty and though it may not look all pretty or what a "missionary" should be feeling or thinking, it is what I am passing through right now. So, bear with me. ;) )

When we are young, the future possibilities stretch out before us as far and as wide as the many years that lie ahead. Our young dreams focus on what we might be or achieve one day, whom we might one day call our own, where we will settle, and what we will name our children. As I was growing, I, too, had expectations and hopes in each of these areas.

However, expectations are wishes cast upon an unforeseen future. Some come to fruition, while others are "lost at sea." My expectations versus God's expectations - they can be drastically different from each other.

I expected to be married by now.

I expected to have had children - by now.

I expected to be "settled" in the life every young girl dreams of - with a family and living in a cute house, right next door to my beloved sister and her family.

I expected to still be close in proximity and relationship with each of the dear friends with whom I grew up.

I expected to be right there - seeing and actively participating in each new season of my friends' lives - dating, marriage, family, children.

I expected to be a close and doting "auntie" to the aforementioned little ones.

I didn't expect to live in a foreign country.

I didn't expect to be so far from much-loved family and friends for extended periods of time.

I didn't expect to not live in or be near my beloved hometown with its amazing quirks and qualities and lovely, friendly people.

I didn't expect to become accustomed to cold showers, scurrying rats and other critters, the endless battle with dirt, and the ongoing struggle with always feeling a bit "out of place."

I didn't expect the ongoing, daily struggle with my weaknesses, my humanity, my besetting sins and habits for days, weeks and years.

I expected to be more mature by now.

I didn't expect that God would take me away to a little remote island far away from all I held close so I could know Him more deeply and intimately.

I didn't expect to experience grace in so many diverse and indescribable ways.

I didn't expect He would take me away from my "comfort zone," so I might better learn forgiveness, freedom, and trust.

I didn't expect to be a witness to God's incredible and active work in a different corner of the world.

I didn't expect to meet and build precious friendships with so many people of different nationalities and backgrounds.

I didn't expect to encounter, learn from and come to value diverse cultures and different "ways of doing things."

I didn't expect to see such incredible, awe-inducing beauty, amazing places, and obvious evidences of God's creativity, power and majesty.

I didn't expect to be actively serving in areas I am so passionate about - youth, discipleship, teaching the Word of God, and communication.

I didn't expect the immense joy of walking alongside another as they discover and embrace God's incredible love and His marvelous plans for them.

I didn't expect to be forced to face and fight the dark, deceptive and enslaving ways of Satan.

I didn't expect to see the practice and results of witchcraft in such tangible ways.

I didn't expect to see God's light shine so brilliantly and pervasively in a darkened part of Uganda.

I didn't expect to see lives radically transformed, families miraculously restored, students given new hope, and people set on fire and on mission with God.

I didn't expect that I would thrill to see and be a part of God's ages-long, world-wide, love-sustained campaign to bring long-lost, "walking dead" rebels back to Himself - from every tongue and tribe and nation.

I didn't expect that I would not want to live any other life, serving any other God, choosing His expectations over my own, laying aside my childhood dreams for something much, much better.

I didn't expect that Gods plans and expectations would yes, be so different than mine, but above and beyond what I could think or even imagine.

"My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from Him." - Psalm 62:5

"Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." - Proverbs 19:21

Liking the "Unlikely"

"God doesn't consider age, background, nationality...He looks at our hearts."

I fervently shared these words with my young friend, who was trying to bravely and cautiously think about her future. I knew she was doubting if and how God could use her, lead her, and bless her.

"I love the scripture in 1 Samuel that says 'man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart'."

I really think God likes the unlikely. 

He promises a long-awaited son to an elderly ancient, well-past-their-prime couple. (Abraham and Sarah)

He chooses the forgotten, smells-like-sheep little brother to be the next anointed king. (David)

He collapses an impenetrable wall - with crazy shouts and trumpet blasts. (Jericho)

He transforms an arrogant teenager into the second most powerful man in Egypt. (Joseph)

He creates an entire nation from a motley crew of 12 brothers born from a dysfunctional polygamous family. (The nation of Israel.)

He calls uneducated, rough-around-the-edges fishermen to be his first disciples. (Peter, James, John)

He almost seems to favor the very young, the very old, the poor, the despised, the overlooked, etc. (Samuel, Moses, the Samaritan woman, Zaccheus...)

Why? Because He likes the unlikely.

It is the "unlikely" who best display His radiant glory. The weaker the vessel, the greater His power is shown.

This is the message I wanted to convey to my friend this afternoon as we shared tea and sweet brown bread. She comes from a poor family, was raised in the islands, is shy and quiet, is one of the few Christians in her predominantly-Muslim home, and has struggled with many challenges over the years.

But, God loves these odds - He really does.

Don't even think there is anything you can or can't do, or that you were born with or born without, that will throw a wrench in His plans for you.

After we prayed over my friend's future and the coming steps and days that only God knows, I told her I was excited for what lies ahead. Because I really am.

I am excited because He has brought her so far already.

I am thrilled because she loves Him and wants to please Him in all she does.

I am very eager to see her unfolding story.

I am confident that the One who began His good work in her will continue and complete it. (Phil. 1:6)

The Author God loves writing in interesting twists and surprise endings, doing above and beyond what we can even ask or think. He's awesome like that.

"Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen." - Ephesians 3:20-21

P.S. Please be praying for my friend, Fauza, that she would continue to trust and believe in the God who has good plans for her.

Videos from Murchison

Here are a couple of short videos that I took during my recent visit to Murchison Falls National Park. Happy viewing! :)

Wishing you all a blessed weekend!

In Awe of His Handiwork

The awesomeness and creativity of my Creator often leave me speechless and take my breath away.

I had several such experiences during a recent "safari" trip to Murchison Falls National Park in northwest Uganda. It is Uganda's oldest park and its largest - spanning about 5000 kilometers.

I took many photos of fun, interesting, and beautiful creatures and birds, as well as incredible scenic views and vistas.

God doesn't have to try to be creative, beautiful and majestic - He just is. And when He gives us glimpses of His character and handiwork, we are left in awe.

Murchison Falls on the Nile River.

Giraffe (there were so many in the park).

An amazing morning sky.

Impala

Elephants

A mother impala helps her just-born young try to stand.

Hippos in Lake Albert.

Giraffes

Saddle-billed stork

Trees on the bank of the Nile.

Murchison Falls

Crocodiles

Sunrise on the Nile at the ferry crossing.

A brilliant sunrise

Cape buffalo

Impala

I loved seeing all of the different types of trees!

Kaluma Falls - upriver from Murchison Falls.

"Great are the works of the Lord, studied by all who delight in them. 

Full of splendor and majesty is His work, and His righteousness endures forever.

He has caused His wondrous works to be remembered; the Lord is gracious and merciful." - Psalm 111:2-4

To see more photos, click here. :)

Breaking His Heart

Thankful for the incredible expanse of God's love.

“What do you think God is thinking?”

I pause a moment – debating how to respond to my young friend’s passion-filled question.

“I think it breaks His heart,” I comment slowly.

We were talking about a former female student who had left the school last term. I was a bit uninformed as to all of the circumstances of her departure, but my young friend filled me in – drawing her information no doubt from the ready “gossip” circulating in the girls’ dormitory.

“Mary” (name changed) had become pregnant a few months ago. But as the story unfolded - in an extremely strange turn of events, she was allegedly impregnated by the same young man who had just impregnated her own mother. In great distress, Mary’s mother then took her unborn baby’s life followed by her own.

Now it seemed Mary had also aborted her little one as well. And, she was apparently acting as if nothing had happened. This blatant nonchalance greatly bothered my young friend, which prompted the above question.

I think she expected me to respond with a judgment or sharp criticism of Mary’s behavior.

“I think it breaks His heart,” I began, continuing with an illustration of how a parent must feel after doing their best to raise a child and then that child rebels and goes after, not what is best, but what is actually most harmful to him or her.

“God will accept her back, if she returns to Him,” I concluded.

My heart aches and breaks for the youth here and how they often settle not for “better” or “best,” but what is sugar-coated garbage in comparison. Seemingly-easy choices with instant results and gratification, versus the “best” – God’s best – waiting on Him for His perfect timing and the right paths carefully planned for them.

I want this for them. But God wants it so much more for them. In fact, He died so they could have it – freely and abundantly.

I love the beloved parable of the Prodigal Son (found in Luke 15) and especially the part where the gracious father runs and embraces his rebellious-turned-repentant son. In that wonderful moment, all sins and debts are completely forgiven and forgotten. The son is fully restored.

I imagine God’s heart breaks over those who are still far – those attempting to find satisfaction in the pig sty, feasting on the swine’s disgusting “leftovers.”

The original Greek uses “prodigally” as an adverb, meaning, “riotous, reckless, wasteful.” The young dude didn’t just go and spend a few quarters at the local arcade, no, he likely indulged in every form of sin-soaked act you can imagine. He went all the way, lived to the hilt, sparing no expense. Even worse was that he squandered his father’s hard-earned wealth - while his father was still living.

We may judge, but we are all prodigals. We are born neck-deep in muddy, disgusting sin, wasting what our Father has freely given us of His wealth, eatin’ with the pigs – oblivious to our sin-encrusted, destruction-bound state. And our Father’s heart is breaking for us.

I may judge Mary, but every day I make choices that break my Father’s heart – when I settle for what is “okay” or even sinful, rather than embracing His best for me, when I saunter toward shiny enticements, and walk away from Him, when I blindly judge other “prodigals,” not gratefully realizing the extravagant grace I have been given.

I don’t know why He waits, looking for me, or why He has compassion, runs toward me and embraces me. That kind of love is incomprehensible. That kind of forgiveness is unfathomable.

It just shows what kind of Creator and God we have. Though His heart has been broken countless times over thousands of years, He still waits, watches, hopes, pities, runs, embraces, kisses, forgives, robes, rejoices, and celebrates over each and every prodigal son or daughter who has returned.

Where do you fit in the story? Are you the prodigal who has, or who has not yet returned?

If you haven't come back, your Heavenly Father’s heart is breaking for you. And He is waiting…and watching to catch a glimpse of the long-lost son or daughter He loves so incredibly much.

Reflections

Birthdays often cause me to be sentimental and reflective.

Last week as I marked another year, my mind went back. Not only was July 9 my birthday, but it also signified 4 1\2 years I have been in Uganda. If my memory serves me correctly, I boarded a plane in Portland on July 9, 2010 for my first and what I thought might be only one year in Uganda.

I have been thinking of the lessons I have realized and the truths I have come to embrace, especially while living and serving on an island on Lake Victoria.

1. Jesus often does the unexpected. He is unpredictable, and frequently what He does is above and beyond what one can imagine. He works in ways beyond human understanding, with a depth of love and truth that is untraceable.

2. I cannot control results. As much as I think, as hard as I try, as much energy I exert, I cannot save a soul or meet the deepest needs of any human. I cannot permanently change, control or transform another life or soul. That is the work of Jesus alone.

3. My life is meant to primarily be a signpost, pointing others to the Savior. No ministry, or outreach or service should ever be about me. It must always be ALL about HIM.

4. Human need has many layers. Poverty is not as simple or as easily "fixed"as it may seem. It is often rooted in multiple and complex layers of cultural, social, historical, spiritual, economic factors and influences. Thus there are often not simple or quick solutions.

5. Programs and activities must never replace or supersede the building of genuine relationships with others. Ministry is about extending the love and light of Christ and that is often done through kindness, genuine care, and friendship.

6. Jesus loves people intimately, completely and unconditionally. For sure He has done this for me. But as I think about the small island I live on and how insignificant it is compared to the numerous places and countless people around the world, I wonder how God is mindful of the people of Lingira Island, Yet, over and over, He has shown His immeasurable love, grace, and kindness here - in this small, "insignificant" place.

7. Jesus is enough. He moved me to a small, remote island, halfway across the world from my home, my family and my friends, away from my comforts and securities to show me He is enough. No place, profession, person or pursuit can satisfy like Jesus does.

8. Joy surfaces in the most unlikely places.Unlike happiness, which is usually found in circumstances, joy is deep-seated and can grow and blossom in the loneliest, darkest, and most forsaken and forgotten of places. Joy is found in Christ and there is no place or circumstance where He is not present.

9. Cultures are rich. The world's many cultures are rich in history, expressions of art, music dance, of foods, holidays and festivals, of parables, proverbs, and stories. And Jesus delights in each one since He is the creative genius behind them. Yes, sin has tainted and corrupted them, but Christ is working to redeem them - so that their colorful diversity and creativity will bring Him praise once again, as they were designed to do.

10. The best and most important lessons are often learned outside of a classroom. What is written here are things that are not taught, they are observed, absorbed, and most often imparted by the Holy Spirit - the world's best teacher.

I am so, so grateful for these and other lessons and yet I know many more lie ahead. :)

I took in this beautiful plot of sunflowers on my birthday last week, which included attending Uganda's national agriculture show in Jinja. 

A Video Post

So, I made and uploaded a video last week for one of my church families in the U.S. And, I thought I would share it you y'all. :)

And, for some fun, here is one I took last week of attempts to load a cow onto the boat. :)

Have a blessed day! :)